One of the things that has helped me be the most successful in this journey is my mental strength. In fact, I had never realized just how mentally strong I was until I began this journey. However, I feel like it’s important to note that mental strength isn’t something that someone is born with- it’s something that is developed through deliberate choices a person makes that either further reinforce their mental strength into a state of victory or demolishes it, causing them to live in a mental state of defeat. I believe that the battle with weight loss is fought not on the scale, treadmill, kitchen, or gym- but in the mind.
While I believe mental strength is something that comes from a series of deliberate choices, there has to be some help in being able to make those choices in the first place, for me- they are my mantras. Mantras are phrases or words that I repeat in times when I need some extra strength, focus, and motivation to make a right decision. An example of one of my most common ones is: “When I say NO to this food (or choice), I am saying YES to myself and my goals- and if I say YES to this food (or choice), I am saying NO to myself and my dreams.” For me, when I make a decision to eat something I shouldn’t, 99% of the time it is because I have allowed myself to believe that it really isn’t that big of a deal to have that cookie, chips, or bread- but these mantras cause me to remember that while the one cookie may not cause me to gain 5lbs, it is leading me down a path of mental defeat. And it is when decisions like that pile up that you find yourself a few weeks down the road 10lbs heavier (or stuck at the same weight) and feeling like a complete failure. On the flip side, when you decide that you aren’t going to say NO to yourself, your goals, and your dreams anymore because of the temporary satisfaction a chip or cookie brings, you feel proud, strong, and invincible. Nothing is worth that- and you are building that mindset of victory with every decision.
The other day I looked back at some of the notes I had made for myself at the very beginning of this journey (96lbs ago) and I found it SO interesting how much my mantras have changed between then and now- which I believe shows growth just as much as the scale has.
My Mantras 96lbs Ago:
- I REFUSE to let FEAR cripple me and kept me fat ANY LONGER!
- I am just at the STARTING POINT.
- If I am not embarrassed for people to see me chowing down at a restaurant I shouldn’t be embarrassed for them to see me changing my health and life at the gym!
- People aren’t there waiting to judge overweight people for coming to the gym, they are there for their own workout!
- I am the ONLY ONE who is going to push me to do this!
- I will PUSH MYSELF TO THE LIMITS if I want to accomplish things I never thought possible- I will prove myself and everyone else wrong!
- If I don’t want to have to do this for the rest of my life, I’ve got to give it MY ALL!
- When I only can do a few minutes on a machine…it’s more than I did yesterday!
Reading those reminded me of just how much fear I dealt with at the beginning of this journey- I was so afraid to be judged by people at the gym, so afraid to face the facts of just how out of shape I really was, afraid that becoming this fit, thin person I desired to be wasn’t really possible. What’s amazing is that for the most part, those thoughts never even enter my mind anymore- that’s what victory will do for you.
My Mantras these days are a bit different:
- You are the only one that is going to push you to your limits- you can’t wait for someone else to, because they never will- it’s YOU. Also, no one is going to say no to this food for you.
- This food (insert temptation) doesn’t love you- YOU’VE got to love you.
- You are a living success story- you aren’t still trying to become successful or prove to yourself you can do it, you have already become successful and now you are just living out that successful life.
- If you were on the Biggest Loser, would you be doing this/eating this?
- There is nothing you can’t do- no one can put limits on your but yourself and if you CHOOSE not to, the sky is the limit.
- You are no longer controlled by food or the desire of it. Food is fuel and that is it. YOU are truly in control now, not food.
- The fat on your body is just as serious as if there were cancer in your body- it will kill you, so take it that seriously.
- You are worth more than the temporary satisfaction that comes from something that will later make you question yourself.
I’m not quite sure I can see as clearly the common thread in these new mantras like I was able to with the old ones but I think now, I my mental struggle is more with realizing my own strength & resolve and not allowing the fear or even the question of going back to the way I was enter my mind.
The truth, I’ve been struggling mentally. I think part of it is partially induced by hormones (aka- it’s that time of the month) but I’m craving things I never usually care for and am having a harder time saying no to things when I used to not even flinch. I’m not doing horribly by any means- shoot- I lost 4lbs last week- BUT I’m definitely in fight mode right now. And I have to let myself know that THAT’S OKAY. It’s OKAY that I’m encountering temptations, it’s okay that I’m having some unhealthy cravings, IT IS OKAY. The only thing that’s not okay is eating out of control or giving into the temptation. I need to remember that all this temptation and craving means is that I am being given another opportunity to reinforce the commitment to myself that I’ve made & the person that I’ve become.
I choose to live FREE. Free from being driven by any craving or temptation, Free from the control of food, Free from the control of negative thoughts. I am living in the FREEDOM that comes from knowing I am worth saying NO to temptations and cravings & I am WORTHY of living the healthy, fulfilled, and fit lifestyle I am enjoying at this very moment.
**Proof that I’m victorious**:
PW Weigh In: 260lbs
CW Weight In: 256lbs
Progress: -4lbs (Meaning: I am only 4 pounds away from losing 100lbs!) It's SO close I can TASTE it!
I hope all this has helped someone realize their strength lies not in fate, personality, or genetics but in the power that comes from their choices.
Have a great weekend everyone & would LOVE to hear some of the mantras you use on your raod to VICTORY!
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WOW.. What a fantastic post!!! Thank you for sharing.. I think I will be printing those off and sticking them around my house.
ReplyDeleteWe can be our own worst enemies, can't we?
ReplyDeleteYou are rocking this weight loss thing! You look (and sound) fabulous.
=)
Aahhhh! Only 4lbs to 100. Girly that's awesome. You have done so well!!!!
ReplyDeletevery uplifting and inspiring post!!!! You can get to that 100lb loss easily just stick with it!
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It has been awesome seeing your transformation Tiff! You will knock that goal out of the park!
ReplyDeleteGreat post!! And SO exciting that you're almost 100 lbs gone! Do you have some great treat planned for yourself when you get there? (Summer shopping spree??)
ReplyDeleteI love your mantra about living the successful life that you've already created. That's something I really struggle to remember. Sometimes I feel like I'm not a success because I'm not at my goal weight yet, so when people tell me how proud they are of me, I feel like a fraud - but I know I'm not! I've accomplished a lot and I need to remember that.
Great post!! And SO exciting that you're almost 100 lbs gone! Do you have some great treat planned for yourself when you get there? (Summer shopping spree??)
ReplyDeleteI love your mantra about living the successful life that you've already created. That's something I really struggle to remember. Sometimes I feel like I'm not a success because I'm not at my goal weight yet, so when people tell me how proud they are of me, I feel like a fraud - but I know I'm not! I've accomplished a lot and I need to remember that.
Tiff, thanks so much for this post. I been struggling lately and this is what I need it to understand that I'm the one who make the choices and that I'm strong enough to say NO.
ReplyDeleteYou look great, congrats on your weight loss :)
You are an amazing person! Good work and Good Luck!
ReplyDeleteOooh!! 4 pounds, girl!!! SO AWESOME!
ReplyDeleteI totally agree w/ you about this being so much about mental strength. I love your mantras & need to adopt some of my own. As a teen, i struggled w/ self esteem & my youth pastor gave me mantras & told me to say them all the time... outloud. They were things like: "I am a woman of power, authority & self-discipline" & "I am beautiful." b/c i didn't think i was. It didn't take long until i really believed those things & gained self-confidence!
The same is true for weightloss, so why do i allow self-doubt & feelings of failure come in all the time on this journey? I dwell on negative thoughts like "i never lose the weight no matter what i do". NO MORE! I gotta come up with some good mantras! :)
I have an award for you!Stop by my blog and check it out;)
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Ok...now THAT is what I am talking about!!! I totally love this post. I know that it is a mental game, I know that you have to be in a right frame of mind....finally someone (you!!) have put a path out there. Mantras! So simple, yet so elusive to me.
ReplyDeleteI do have mantras, but they are so general...Overweight is hard, losing weight is hard, maintaining weight is hard, choose your hard...
I love that one, but I think the key is to get specific. Thank you, thank you, thank you, for being this transparent. I mean, I enjoy the "what I am eating" and "how I am moving" parts to all weight loss blogs...but I am so thankful for the "how I am working on my thinking!"
Congrats on 4 lbs to go to major milestone.
I stumbled across your blog while googling TBL photos of Courtney a few weeks ago, and I'm sure glad I did! Yours is the first blog I've ever read and I find it very inspirational. I started with reading your oldest posts and have now read every one. :) Your posts are well-written and insightful and I'm amazed at how much self-discovery you've accomplished in your journey. It truly is all about mental state. I'm a firm believer in mantras/affirmations and guided imagery. My latest weight loss tool is recording affirmations in my own voice and listening to them on my ipod as I fall asleep (recording is easy - you just need a laptop & a microphone and/or headset). I was able to make a HUGE list of affirmations using excerpts from your posts over the past year. Thank you!
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